The Seven Jobs of “Se”
One two-letter word doing seven unrelated jobs. Reflexive, reciprocal, impersonal, passive, the se that replaces le, the accidental se — and how to tell them apart in real sentences.
By Parlazo
23 September 2026 · Updated 29 September 2026 · 5 min read
No other word in Spanish causes as much quiet confusion as se. Two letters, no obvious meaning, and it turns up everywhere: se llama, se habla español, se me olvidó, se lo di. Learners tend to absorb one or two uses, then treat every other appearance as decoration.
It isn’t decoration. Se is doing seven distinct jobs, and they are unrelated to each other. Once you can name them, sentences that looked arbitrary become readable.
1. Reflexive: the action comes back to the subject
The one every course teaches first. The subject does something to itself.
Se lava las manos — he washes his hands. María se viste — María gets dressed. Compare lava el coche, he washes the car, where the action lands on something else. Test: can you add a sí mismo (to himself) without it sounding absurd? If yes, it’s reflexive.
2. Reciprocal: they do it to each other
Identical in form, different in meaning, and only possible with a plural subject.
Se abrazaron — they hugged each other. Se escriben todos los meses — they write to each other every month. Se conocieron en Sevilla — they met each other in Seville.
Context usually resolves the ambiguity, and when it doesn’t, Spanish adds el uno al otro or mutuamente to force the reciprocal reading.
3. The se that is really le
This one is pure mechanics and catches everybody. When an indirect object pronoun (le, les) meets a direct object pronoun beginning with l (lo, la, los, las), the first becomes se — because le lo is unpronounceable to Spanish ears.
Le di el libro → se lo di. Les compré flores → se las compré.
This se has nothing to do with reflexives at all. It is a pronunciation workaround wearing the same costume, which is exactly why it confuses people.
4. Impersonal: people in general
English uses you, one, or people vaguely. Spanish uses se with a singular verb.
Aquí se vive muy bien — life is good here. Se dice que va a llover — they say it’s going to rain. ¿Cómo se dice…? — how do you say…?
Nobody in particular is doing the action, and that is the point. This construction is everywhere in signs, instructions and generalisations.
5. Passive: the thing it was done to becomes the subject
Known as the pasiva refleja. Spanish strongly prefers it to the English-style passive with ser.
Se venden pisos — flats for sale. Se habla español — Spanish spoken here. Se construyó en 1946 — it was built in 1946.
The distinction from the impersonal is agreement: here the verb agrees with the thing. One flat, se vende piso; several, se venden pisos. Get that agreement right and your written Spanish immediately looks more native.
6. The accidental se: it wasn’t my fault
A genuinely lovely piece of grammar with no English equivalent. Spanish has a structure for things that happen to you rather than because of you.
- Se me cayó el vaso — the glass fell on me, i.e. I dropped it, but not on purpose
- Se me olvidó — it slipped my mind
- Se nos ha roto la lavadora — the washing machine has broken on us
- Se le perdieron las llaves — he lost the keys (they got lost on him)
The pattern is se + indirect object pronoun + verb agreeing with the object. Rompí el plato is a confession; se me rompió el plato is an explanation. Spanish speakers use the second far more often than learners do, and picking it up changes how natural you sound.
7. The se that changes the verb’s meaning
Some verbs simply mean something different with se attached. This is not a rule you derive; it is vocabulary.
- ir to go → irse to leave
- dormir to sleep → dormirse to fall asleep
- llevar to carry → llevarse to take away, or to get along with someone
- acordar to agree → acordarse to remember
- quedar to arrange to meet → quedarse to stay
Related to this is the emphatic se that adds a sense of completion: comí la tarta is I ate the cake; me comí la tarta entera is I ate the whole thing, and you can hear the satisfaction in it.
How to tell them apart quickly
Three questions handle almost every case.
- Is there another pronoun right after it? Se lo, se la, se los — then it is job 3, the disguised le.
- Is there a pronoun like me, te, nos between se and the verb? Se me, se te, se nos — then it is job 6, the accidental one.
- Is there no stated subject at all? Then it is job 4 or 5, and the verb agreement tells you which.
Everything left over is reflexive, reciprocal or lexical, and those are usually obvious from the verb itself.
If you found this the kind of grammar that yields to being taken apart slowly, the same approach works on the other famous bogeyman: the Spanish subjunctive without the fear.
Vocabulary
- reflexivo — reflexive
- recíproco — reciprocal
- la pasiva refleja — the se passive
- impersonal — impersonal
- el complemento directo / indirecto — direct / indirect object
- concordar — to agree (grammatically)
- se me olvidó — it slipped my mind
- se me hace tarde — I’m running late
- se nos fue la luz — the power went out on us
Where to go next
Take a page of any Spanish text and highlight every se. Label each one with a number from one to seven. It is a fifteen-minute exercise, and it is the fastest way to turn this from a list you have read into something you notice automatically.
The accidental se in particular only becomes yours through speaking, because it is a reflex about blame rather than a rule about verbs. Working through it out loud with a tutor is the shortcut — you can book a single Spanish lesson on Parlazo and pay for just that one, no subscription.
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